Regret, and sadness, and conflicted emotions are the asking price of choice. Regret doesn’t necessarily mean that you chose wrong: it means that you chose, and in doing so, you didn’t choose the other thing.

To me, “embracing the suck” sounded like hustle culture. It sounded like embracing suffering for suffering’s sake. And it didn’t make sense in the context of thru-hiking: in taking a journey for the journey’s sake.

I enjoy pushing myself but I’m not particularly eager for this hike to end. What would be the point of it all if I never slowed down, stopped, breathed, and stretched the beautiful moments paper-thin?

Some of these images were from many years ago. Some more recent. They’re from all the places that make me think of Louisiana - state parks, my parents’ backyard, dirt single-tracks, from my many drives down River Road.

5 years ago, I stood on the Appalachian Trail at Newfound Gap and knew that one day, I would be there again - thru-hiking from Georgia. That’s why my trail name is Newfound.

It took practice to become good at ignoring my own instincts, so I figured it would take the same amount of practice to trust myself again. So I walked into the woods, even when fear coiled in my stomach and every thought was filled with doubt. I remained in that place of discomfort, even when I set up my tent, climbed inside, and would lay awake the entire night, too afraid of my own solitude to sleep.